Private Poker Games; Worth The Risk?

For those of you who sent the many positive comments about how the world should be non-smoking; thanks, for the others who were outraged by the idea of banning smoking; too bad, the time is coming.

Anyway, I wanted to talk about what you should consider when you are invited to house games. What I am calling a house game is just that, a private game at someone’s house or business. First of all, you should be aware of the local laws. In many places it is against the law to play for money in a private game. Some states allow it if the house is not taking a rake, but many do not. Also keep in mind that if your game is raided, you are at risk to lose all money that is with you, as well as your freedom, at least for a little while. Many games have gone to a no money policy, where settlement is either by check, or next day with cash. I am not commenting on the legal or moral implications of this method, that is something for you to work out, however, when you settle by check or in the future, it allows for abuse. Specifically, if someone gets stuck deep and keeps taking more credit, they can hit a point where they decide not to pay, and give up on that game. Depending on the amount, there may be consequences and of once games find out you don’t pay, good luck getting any additional credit.

I know of several players, who after sizeable wins in reputable games are slow paid. Meaning it took a long time and many aggravating phone calls. You will often here the phrase “the game is guaranteed.” What they are saying is that those running the game guarantee payment. This can be reality or fantasy, and can be justification for a larger rake or house drop. What I mean is that they say they guarantee the money, but then when someone stiffs them, which will eventually happen, they may or may not come through. A guarantee is only as good as those providing it. I wonder how the extended warrantees are doing at Circuit City?

The rake or house take from a private game must also be looked at. When friends get together, often times everyone kicks in some fixed amount to cover food and drink, which might be pizza and beer, or steaks and lobster from The Palm. In some of the big games in NY and LA they order food from the most expensive restaurants, have great wine and drinks, and even massage therapists to help you relax. All of this is included, but just like any “all-inclusive” activity; you wind up paying one way or another. I have seen rakes as big as 5% uncapped. What this means is that from Every Pot the house is taking 5% with no limit. So if there is a 40k pot, which is not uncommon in big games, the house is taking a whopping $2,000. If you are getting a conservative 30 hands per hour with an average pot size of even $2,000, that equates to a $3,000 per hour house drop. So in a 10-hour game they are taking $30,000 out of the game. Now if you factor in 9 players each eating expensive food, and having massages, and even a hotel suite rental for the night, that still leaves a nice profit. On occasion a game is so juicy that a high house take is overcomable, because most of the players are so bad. Another common rake is a percentage with a cap, which can help. So if the rake were 5% with a $300 cap per hand for example, then if there is a monster pot of say $80,000, then you would pay the $300 instead of $4,000 for that hand. Whatever the rake is you should go in with your eyes wide open so you know what you are paying. In general, a 5% rake without a low cap can be tough to overcome.

Another thing I always consider is the safety of the game. Lots of poker games have been robbed over the years, and it’s always a risk. Bobby Hoff, who is one of the original Texas gamblers, and can be found at the Commerce on a daily basis, told me a story about a game being robbed that is the best I’ve ever heard. Now I wont do it justice, he is a great storyteller, but here goes. One of the regulars in a big game that pretty much always lost all of his money and who was also a well-known criminal, towards the end of a long night of play and after yet another big loss, pulls out a gun and takes all the money on the table. As he is leaving, another regular who was usually one of the big winners asked him if he would be back to play the next week. Without a moments hesitation he answered “sure, why not.” I love this story, he was such a fish that they didn’t even care that he robbed them, as long as he returned on a regular basis. I am not sure this would fly in most games today, but hey, whatever works.

So keep in mind that if you are robbed in a private game, they are taking all your money, watch, wallet, cell phone and anything else of value. I have had several players tell me that they were tied up and had guns stuck in their faces. There was that robbery of an underground poker club in NY where a small stakes player, whom if my memory serves me, was a schoolteacher, was shot and killed, when a shotgun was dropped, and accidently discharged.
Even in a reputable casino there are risks. I remember a story from last year at the Taj Mahal in Atlantic City, where two players got into a disagreement about a seat in a low stakes limit holdem game, one player ultimately stabbed the other in the neck and killed him. (here is a link to the story: http://www.pokernews.com/news/2008/04/conflicting-reports-taj-poker-stabbing.htm I guess that guy has a reserved seat in a regular prison game now.

So, buyers beware, playing in an illegal game carries risk. Risk of getting arrested, not paid, paying a huge house rake, robbed, and on a rare occasion death, but you could be run over crossing the street or abducted by aliens and subjected to the dreaded rectal probe. Why do aliens always have to use the rectal probe, and why does it always seem to be on residents of a mobile home park recently hit by a tornado? I always loved the Jeff Foxworthy “you might be a redneck” lines such as “If you’ve been on TV describing what the tornado was like as it came through your mobile home more than one time, you might be a redneck.” But I digress. Just like playing a hand, weigh the variables and make a determination on your best course of action.