My previous columns discussed learning about theory, strategy, and your opponents. Now I'll cover the most important learning: developing self-awareness. You may doubt its importance, but it dramatically affects your results. Do you:
• Play hands preflop that you
know you should fold?
• Go too far with hands,
knowing that the pot odds don't justify calling?
• Keep playing when you
know you're off your game?
• Challenge tougher games and players even though you
know you should concentrate on weaker ones?
• Let anger, fear, or other emotions affect your play, even when you
know better?
If you already know that you're making mistakes, acquiring more strategic knowledge is obviously not going to stop them. If you don't learn
why you make them, they will continue, no matter how much theory you know.
Developing self-awareness is also the most difficult type of learning. You have powerful defenses against learning unpleasant truths about yourself. To put it bluntly, you really don't want to know some of your weaknesses. To develop greater self-awareness, take several steps:
• Study the psychological literature
• Understand defense mechanisms
• Analyze your own reactions
Study the Psychological Literature
If you don't understand psychological principles, you can't get the full benefit of any other information. Naturally, I recommend my own books, T
he Psychology of Poker, Your Worst Poker Enemy, and
Your Best Poker Friend (to be published this December). Self-awareness is discussed in all three, and it's the later two's dominant theme. Also read Dr. Feeney's
Inside the Poker Mind, Dr. McKenna's
Beyond Tells and Beyond Bluffs, and Hilger and Taylor's
The Poker Mindset.
Don't limit your reading to
poker psychology, because people don't change much when they play poker. The same psychological factors that cause mistakes at the poker table cause them at home and work.
Understand Defense Mechanisms
We all use defense mechanisms to protect our egos. Denial, rationalization, repression, and fantasizing hide unpleasant truths, and "make us feel more comfortable … [but] our defenses are essentially self-defeating; they give us temporary relief, but aggravate our problems … defensiveness therefore feeds on itself. Underlying problems are not solved; new problems develop; the person becomes more dependent on his defenses; and more and more of his energy is devoted to self-deception."
That quotation is from my book
Anxiety and the Executive. When I wrote it, the executive culture was quite anti-introspective: Executives were expected to concentrate on their jobs, not analyze themselves. Since then, that culture has changed dramatically. Because they realize that increased self-awareness improves results, thousands of executives use coaches and seminars to learn about themselves.
The poker culture is still extremely anti-introspective, but a similar change is occurring. Until recently, there were no serious books on poker psychology, but now, several of them sell well. A growing number of players want to understand themselves better, and some great players have written about self-awareness. For example, Barry Greenstein's
Ace on the River contains a wonderful chapter, "The Traits of Winning Players," and his second most important trait is that they are "honest with themselves."
More players will study defense mechanisms when they realize how destructive they are. For example, many players:
• Deny their limitations and challenge superior players.
• Rationalize that their unsatisfactory results are caused by bad luck.
• Blame their losses on other people's mistakes.
Unless you understand defense mechanisms and recognize your dependence on them, you can't overcome their destructive effects.
Analyze Your Own Reactions
Regard your reactions as learning opportunities. For example, when reading an article, write down your answers to a few questions:
• Which points most appealed to me?
• Which ones did I dislike?
• Why did I feel this way?
Every time you react strongly to someone or something, ask yourself:
• How is it similar and different from my reactions to other experiences?
• Why did I react that way?
Every few weeks, review your notes. Let's say that you like authors who emphasize intuition, but reject those who recommend a logical, mathematical approach. That pattern suggests that you have neglected the mathematical, logical side of poker and should work on it.
Pay particular attention to any strong negative reactions. They suggest that something has struck a sensitive nerve. For example, getting so angry about bad beats that you criticize weak players says a great deal about you.
Countless authorities have said that berating weak players is stupid. They may quit or play better. You know the experts are right, but you just can't resist, especially when their mistake costs you a pot. But your overreaction means that you have a problem. Unfortunately, you may deny that reality, and blame those "idiots" for making you miserable.
No! Look hard at yourself and ask, "Why am I acting so stupidly?" Your actions suggest that you're not really trying to maximize your profits, no matter what you say. Your frustration outweighs the pleasure you get from winning the weak players' money.
Let's take another common error, refusing to fold pocket aces when they are clearly beaten. Countless players have lost their stacks because they just could not lay down those aces. They knew they were beaten, but thought, "I waited this long for them, and I'm not going to let that jerk push me off them." That reaction suggests that you have two problems: a sense of entitlement and excessive machismo. You think you deserve to win with those aces, and nobody is going to push you off them.
Note the word "suggests," because these patterns don't prove anything. Regard them as hypotheses to be tested by getting additional information.
Then, get some objective information by discussing your self-analysis with someone you trust. A professional coach is best, but, as I wrote in "Do You Really Need a Coach?" anyone who listens carefully and responds honestly can help you to see yourself more clearly. You may learn some surprising things about yourself, and some surprises may be unpleasant. Because your defenses are strongest in areas in which you are weakest and most vulnerable, the more you dislike learning something, the more you need to learn it.
Conclusions
This column concludes my series, "Learning Efficiently." You probably have thought much more about what you learn than how you learn.
It's time to learn how to learn. Because there is so much information to acquire, becoming an efficient learner can improve your entire future. If you learn more efficiently than your competition, you will have an immense advantage at the poker table and everywhere else.
The critical first step is to recognize that the passive approach you used as a student doesn't create enough understanding to play well and develop yourself. You won't get the full benefit of whatever you read or do without learning actively. That principle applies to learning about poker theory, other people, and especially yourself.
I've asked questions rather than give answers, because you have to do most of the work. Commit yourself to taking action, criticizing yourself, getting feedback, and relating everything to the central question: What can I do to improve my results, both at and away from the tables?
Dr. Schoonmaker ([email protected]) coaches only on psychology issues, such as controlling impulses, coping with losing streaks, going on tilt, and planning your self-development.
