Life Lessons and Poker

I just had my 65th birthday and I wrote a post on Facebook about some of the life lessons I have learned over the past 65 years. The older I get, the more I realize that time passes quickly. It is very cliché, but it does seem like just yesterday I was turning 21 and now I am entering the final quarter of my life. Hopefully I will get to go into overtime!

I still feel and act young so I’m not complaining, but I do better understand the saying that, “Youth is wasted on the young.” As I was contemplating what to write about in my final column of the year, a friend suggested that I focus on life lessons I have learned at the poker table, so here goes…

I have learned that patience is a virtue. I don’t have to play K-10 because I am bored. I can wait for a premium hand or an implied odds hand under the right conditions. I can wait for a seat if need be and play in another game while I wait for the one I want to play in. I can chat with my opponents in between hands. 

I have learned to be respectful and tolerant of others. We play poker with people from all nations, people with disabilities, people who don’t speak English, beginners, seniors, juniors, people of all races and religions. They each deserve our respect unless they deliberately misbehave or disrespect others.

I have learned to keep my ego in check at the poker table. For the first few years I played poker, I would take bad beats personally. How could someone beat my aces with 7-2 offsuit in a raised pot? It wasn’t fair. My ego convinced me that I needed to let my opponents know how badly they played or how lucky they got. While I certainly can’t claim to never get frustrated at the table, for the most part I have learned over the past 40 years that beats will happen and that you need to embrace them. You need to be kind to your opponents, especially if they don’t play well as you don’t want to give them cause to leave with your money. If someone sucks out in a pot they shouldn’t have been in, I am truly grateful that they were trying to give me their money but the deck wouldn’t let them…this time!

I have learned to be less judgmental. Players have different styles and play differently than I do, but it doesn’t mean they are wrong. I watch and learn and have adopted some interesting plays in my own game as a result.

I have expanded my general knowledge about the world through my adventures involving poker. I spent six years traveling the world with the World Poker Tour and 26 years traveling with Card Player Cruises. I have also traveled on my own to tournaments and cash games around the world. I’ve had the opportunity to consult with poker rooms in Singapore, the Philippines, Europe, and the Caribbean. This has allowed me to make friendships all over the world. Because of my travels, I’ve learned to respect other cultures and keep an open mind and try new things. 

I have learned to let go of the past and not dwell on my mistakes. I used to beat myself up when I did something stupid at the poker table. I would be miserable for days when I lost. Over the years, I have learned to move on and learn from my mistakes. Life is much happier this way! I am a true believer of the five-year rule; if it isn’t going to matter in five years, don’t let it bother you now.

I have learned that I must always continue to learn or I will fall behind. This is so true in poker. I try to read every new poker book, discuss poker with friends, watch poker on TV, and constantly get better at poker. There are always new trends and new ideas. Some work and some don’t. The important thing is to keep trying to improve.

I have learned to keep poker in perspective. I have learned that your health, your family, and your friends are more important than poker. Don›t get me wrong, I still love poker! I look forward to the next time I get to play. That said, I know that there are other things more important in life than poker. When I first became a professional poker player, I would not make any plans outside of poker because I didn›t know when I would be ready to quit. I would get that itch to play if I was away from the tables for more than 24 hours. Nowadays, I spend more time watching TV, cruising, going to theater, and enjoying time with good friends than I do playing poker and I am happy with that. 

I have learned about money management. I’ve had many friends who became addicts and played too high for their bankrolls. Luckily, I have never felt the need to put my bankroll at risk by playing in the biggest games available. I used to win a little when I won and lose a lot when I lost. I have come to terms with my losses and never lose more than I can comfortably afford to lose.

Poker can give you a great life if you respect the game and learn your own life’s lessons. As we approach the holidays, I thank my family and friends who have been such good influences and have given me so many happy memories. Do some random acts of kindness during the holidays for strangers as well as for friends. Take the time to count your blessings. I will be in Australia over Thanksgiving hopefully learning new life lessons. I wish everyone a happy and joyous holiday season. ♠

Linda is a member of the Poker Hall of Fame and the Women in Poker Hall of Fame. She is available to host poker seminars, corporate poker events, and charity tournaments. You can contact her through her at [email protected].