by Jan Fisher | Published: Aug 17, 2001 |
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Playing in a poker game or tournament with a friend can be tough. How can and does this affect your play, and what are some of the signs of possible problems of playing with friends? First and foremost, there's the ever-popular and quite common knee bump under the table. What am I talking about? You know, you are sitting next to your buddy and you are both involved in a hand. You have a monster and you can see that this will become a ramming, jamming hand. Your friend is next to you, and is also poised and ready to enter the pot. What do you do? You knee him! That's right, you discreetly give him a little kick with your foot or nudge with your knee under the table. Why do you do this? To let him know that you have a big duke and that he should fold his hand! What are you trying to accomplish with this move? Well, of course, you are trying to save your buddy some money. What is it that you really are doing? You are cheating! That's right, you are colluding in a highly unethical manner without really realizing it or intending to do so.
This may seem like a strong way to put something that many of you do every day in your games, but it's true. Let's examine why giving someone a nudge under the table is unethical. You are giving information to one player that the other players are not privy to. Not only that, but your "message" may be misconstrued and cause your friend to play his hand differently from the way he had planned. Clearly, when you nudge your neighbor, it is your "signal" to him to muck his hand. You are trying to save him money. But suppose that your neighbor has a strong hand, too? Maybe his hand is better than yours, and he is throwing away the winner. And maybe neither of you has the best hand. If that is the case, you are costing another player in the hand money. As you can see, there's a multitude of reasons why you should never try to give away information about your hand, even if you are trying to do so as a favor. Just play your hand as you always would, regardless of who is in the game.
Also, it is important to remember that check-raising is a very viable part of a poker game, and it's an important strategic play. It is used for many different reasons, such as trying to increase the size of the pot, eliminating some of the field, and so on. About the only thing it's not used for is a popularity contest. That's right; use this play on your friends, your foes, and all of your poker adversaries. It is not used to make friends and influence people; it is used to make money, period. If you find it difficult to play hard against your friends, you should not play in the same game with them. Remember, you can always buy your pal dinner on the way home.
Another note along this line is soft-playing. Checking when you should bet or calling when you should raise when you are involved in a hand with a friend is soft-playing. As your poker experience increases, so will the number of people with whom you play. People at the poker table are your adversaries, and it is your job to try to take their money. If you don't do it, someone else will. If you do not try to get their money first, they will try to get yours. Play everyone in your game with the same intensity and you will become a well-rounded player. Keep personalities out of the game, and do not play to friendships. Play to win! Class dismissed.
Please write to me with your poker questions and comments.
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