Talk the Talk and Walk the Walk

A couple of years ago I sat down in my favorite game in Atlantic City to find myself sitting across from the "table expert,"; who thought it was necessary to comment on just about every hand from beginning to end. It was a little annoying, but OK. Some of his commentary implied that some players weren't playing correctly. That was more annoying, but marginally OK. In a hand that he had folded, he told everyone what hand he thought I had, and that with four callers, I was a 4-to-1 underdog. That was most annoying, and probably not OK. Fortunately for me, his stupid comment helped me get action on a monster hand that ended up winning a big pot. This guy was starting to get on everyone's nerves, but everyone kept quiet until …

Our table expert started abusing the dealer, who was doing a flawless job of running the game. In fact, I was impressed that she could run the game so smoothly in spite of his harassment. I got involved in a heads-up hand that didn't involve our table expert. During this hand, he distracted the dealer so badly that she dealt cards before the action was complete. While we waited for the floorperson to come over and straighten things out, he added insult to injury by continuing to abuse the dealer. I told him that it was his fault the dealer misdealt because he was distracting her in a hand in which he wasn't even involved. Can you guess what happened next?

Mr. Table Expert pointed his finger at my face and said, "I can say anything I want and I can do anything I want, and there's nothing you can do about it!"; After he repeated that phrase to me for the third time, I reached for my six-shooter. At that very moment, the floorperson came over and I quickly holstered my revolver, and another life was saved in this Wild West "I can do anything I want"; cardroom in Atlantic City. OK, I'm just kidding about the revolver, but I was about to shoot him full of verbal bullets. He repeated his statement, and I told him I wasn't interested in talking to him and that he should talk to the floorperson, who was tapping him on the shoulder. After their private little talk in the corner, the table expert came back to the table, didn't utter one word, and embarrassingly slinked away a few minutes later. In other words, "He talked the talk and then walked the walk."; I presume the floorperson told him that if he said another word, he would be ejected.

This experience came to mind after I read Nolan Dalla's recent column on offensive language and bad behavior. I think dealers, floorpeople, and tournament directors often have an extraordinarily tough job of sorting out what transpired during many incidents and deciding what's the fairest course of action. However, I believe that any explicit forms of verbal or physical threats, intimidation, or insults are unacceptable, and should be treated with zero tolerance by all casino staff. All players should always feel safe and secure, which is good for the players and good for poker.

On the other hand, although I'm usually relatively quiet, I love a good show. I appreciate the occasional loud outburst and colorful language, as long as it's not threatening or insulting to any of the players. This is part of the pleasure, stimulation, entertainment, and sheer fun I get from going to a cardroom. When I was sweating my wife, Olga, at the $10,000 buy-in championship event at the Sands Million Dollar Showdown, she was at the same table with Mike Matusow. Every time Mike survived an all-in confrontation, he jumped up and screamed, "Yeah, yeah, yeah!"; while pumping his fist at the ground. It wasn't threatening or insulting in any way, shape, or form. In fact, it was so exciting and energizing that I found myself rooting for him to come in second place after Olga! His outbursts lasted about five seconds and then he got back to business. I think cardrooms should allow non-threatening and non-insulting outbursts for a few seconds. There's nothing wrong with releasing some energy; you never know what'll happen if you make some people suppress too much for too long.

A long time ago, I went to a little cardroom run by a man by the name of Al Roth, and I asked him about the house rules and if a check-raise was allowed. After he had a hearty laugh, he said that it ain't poker without a check-raise being allowed. That's the way I feel about behavior: It ain't poker without a little screamin' and cussin', as long as nobody is threatened or insulted. After all, you have to be over 21 years old to play in a cardroom.

You should find out where your cardroom draws the line and encourage management not to tolerate threats, insults, or harassment. If you cross the line and talk the talk, prepare to be kicked out and walk the walk!

Editor's note: Robert was the 2002 World Series of Poker champion and is the instructor on the "WiseGuys on Texas Hold'em"; videos, starring some famous actors from the Sopranos. The videos are very informative, as well as entertaining, and are available at wiseguyson.com.