The Poker Player’s Manifesto

In 2005 Barry Greenstein wrote Ace on the River and it has been to this day one of a few books that I will recommend to players. Sometimes I will loan them one of two signed copies I was proud to receive after busting him in back-to-back WPTs. I love the book because it isn’t so much about how to play poker, it’s more about how to be a professional that plays poker for a living. Since you’re reading this magazine and this article I assume that you are either professional or taking poker seriously, and I’m glad you’re reading this because this is the essence of our game. If you don’t take poker seriously then have fun and don’t act like a jerk.

We all must remember that we are playing a game. If you can’t have fun playing a game then you shouldn’t be playing. Well, you say, it’s my job. It isn’t fun anymore. Well, then, you’re doing it wrong. Comparing poker to every other game played on ESPN, it’s universal across the spectrum which players are liked the most and which ones people don’t like. Everybody loves Peyton Manning while Michael Vick carries a different, ahem, fan base. Mike Trout is a pleasure to watch play baseball while Barry Bonds was booed regularly by my boys in orange. Nobody can say anything bad about Phil Mickelson, but they might have a thing or two they’d like to tell Tiger. The favorite athletes are going to sell more tickets and therefore command a higher pay check, and they may even play longer than they otherwise would simply due to their fan appeal.

The same goes for poker, except the impact of acting like a jerk hurts your bottom line much more directly. Poker is a game where your customers actively play with you rather than buy a ticket to watch you play. If you are a pleasure to play with then it doesn’t matter how good you are at poker, people will still play with you. One of the greatest compliments I ever received at a poker table came from one of the greatest fish I have ever played with. He said “every time I see you in a game Bryan, I do my best to get into it because you are so much fun to play with.” If we spent more time making the game fun and acting like pleasant human beings also playing a game then the fish will come to us.

The first step to having a pleasant disposition at the table is simply to never get upset. In 2005 I got to know Doc, the sweetest dude you could ever meet. I quickly realized that he was an absolute wizard at limit Texas hold’em and friends with everybody in the room. He knew all the regular’s names, regardless if they were pro or not. He treated everybody with respect. He had a sack of goodies, and if you needed anything from a tic tac to toothpaste you can bet that Doc would have it and be happy to help. Doc understood the game and gamble. He would never react to a bad beat, just say something like “yup, that beats me, nice hand.” He even nicknamed J-9 the stackbuilder, and would often play the hand like aces. He convinced the rest of us fellow wizards to follow suit, talk up the stackbuilder as much as possible, and smile huge when he put on a dirty one. He’s say something like, “the problem with the stackbuilder isn’t winning with it, it’s hard to get it dealt to you!” Eventually everybody started playing the stackbuilder. Doc, to this day, is my idol for table presence and I have tried to emulate my career after his example since.

Secondly, table presence requires a person. The guy who wears a hoodie, sunglasses, and/or headphones and doesn’t interact with the table doesn’t have a pleasant table presence. People don’t like playing poker with that guy. People are used to idiots though and one or two won’t ruin a poker game, but multiples will. I have seen numerous times people quit games that were full of headphones, eventually being replaced by somebody else in headphones, and they all sit there quietly wondering to themselves why the game is so bad. Take off those glasses, if you’re going to wear headphones then only wear them on one ear, and don’t hide under your hoodie. Now, before you start arguing with me, I’m cool with all of those things during a hand. Go shields up after your preflop raise gets called or three-bet.

On that note, Tommy Angelo outlined best the etiquette for talking during a poker hand. There is a two dimensional plane between all active players in the hand to the pot and dealer. If your words cross any of those planes, then you’re annoying somebody. So, if the 3, 5, and 7 seats are engaged in a pot, then players in the 4 and 6 seats shouldn’t make a sound. I’m cool with the 8 seat talking, but only if it’s to the player in the 9 or 10 seat, and the 1 and 2 seat can only talk to each other. Once the pot is pushed, banter with whomever you wish.

Table banter is an art that will either make or break a game. A talkative and happy table is a good table. Talk about anything you want, but don’t talk about strategy. Your opponents will often want to talk about strategy, because they’re playing a game they’re interested in and want to talk about it, but you should never talk strategy. If you do it should be some quip like build pot now, make hand later. Don’t ever tell a player that they did something wrong. Don’t ever agree with them if they think they made a mistake, unless of course they’re making a mistake thinking they made a mistake. Better yet, steer the conversation back to fly fishing or Spearamint Rhino or A Million Ways to Die in the West. You simply don’t want to make your opponents better at poker, feel bad for playing bad, or get bored playing the game. If the game goes all night and everybody leaves with smiles, then you performed well at work today. ♠

Bryan Devonshire has been a professional poker player for nearly a decade and has more than $2 million in tournament earnings. Follow him on Twitter @devopoker.