Hollywood Henderson Will Play for You

Frank "Hollywood" Henderson is one of the most colorful characters in poker. You can't help smiling when you're in the presence of this likeable, humorous rascal. It's only later, after he's dazzled and overwhelmed you with numbers and percentages and options, that you discover that he's talked you into backing him, or at least taking a piece of him, in some tournament.

Henderson reigns as the undisputed master at getting himself staked. He could talk Ebenezer Scrooge into handing over money to him. However, it would be a big mistake to dismiss Frank as some railbird who's just walked in off the street and would have trouble coming in 10th in a one-table satellite. This boy plays just as impressively, if not better, than he talks.

TheHendonMob.com database lists 57 cash-ins for Henderson that total more than $675,000. His 24 World Series of Poker cashes include a bracelet in pot-limit Omaha in 1989 and a second-place finish to Johnny Chan in the 1987 WSOP championship event.
Other notable achievements include three wins at the 1995 Four Queens Classic.

Over the years, I've mined a wealth of material for my columns from Frank, but it was based on his prowess as a salesman rather than as a player. For example, I once wrote a column called "Hands for Sale," in which Hollywood Henderson was selling gullible players the rights to have their favorite hand named after them - documented, notarized, and authenticated by some mysterious poker federation. While that column may have been the product of my twisted imagination, anyone who knows Frank realizes that the story wasn't exaggerated that much. In fact, he really would have been selling the rights to hands if he had thought of the idea first. But the amazing thing is that no matter what I have Hollywood Henderson doing in my columns, he always manages to do me one better.

He's now achieved another milestone in the world of poker by being the first name player ever to attempt selling himself on eBay. No, he wasn't selling one of his kidneys, although I wouldn't put that past him, either. He was offering to play for someone in the eighth event of this year's World Series, $2,000 pot-limit Omaha, the one in which he won his bracelet. Anyone putting up the two grand (or perhaps just making a winning bid) would get 50 percent of his action, with Henderson paying all expenses. He also listed all of the eight tournaments he planned to enter, including H.O.R.S.E. and the championship event, indicating he might accept bids on some of the other seven, as well. He did not include the casino employees and the ladies tournaments, although I'm confident that if anyone put up the money, Henderson would find a way to enter both of those events, as well.

From time to time, I have come across pathetic pleas on RGP (rec.gambling.poker) or other poker forums from unknown players begging to be staked in some tournament or other. That's akin to some street-corner derelict sticking a paper cup in your face. Henderson's approach on eBay, of course, was far more proper, polished, and persuasive. He listed his various poker accomplishments, including a best all-around player award at Commerce Casino, and described at length the final hand in the '87 main event when Johnny Chan's A-9 outdrew his pocket fours to cost him the world championship. He promised all the necessary documentation guaranteeing the legitimacy of any transaction. If a backer had a business, he offered to advertise that enterprise by wearing the firm's logo on his jacket or cap. He even appealed to everyone's patriotism by taking a minute "to remember the brave men and women of the Armed Forces, who are serving to keep us free."

About the only thing missing in his presentation was the assurance that God would bless anyone who went into partnership with him.

This is being written a few weeks before the start of the World Series, so I don't know if Henderson eventually had any takers. Maybe not. After all, you can't expect a long line of investors eager to put up $10,000 to back someone in the main event, for example, against an expected 10,000 opponents. But he's certainly written a new chapter in the history of poker. The only problem is that once the word gets around, every railbird who can scrape up enough money to pay the eBay fee will be scrambling to be staked. Few could match Henderson's credentials, of course, but I imagine that as the competition for backers heats up, a bidding war will break out with higher and higher percentages being dangled to prospects. Here's how I visualize a typical ad:

"ONCE IN A LIFETIME OFFER! Expert poker player who's once made the fourth table in the Watermelon Harvest Festival at Big Denny's Barstow Card Casino will allow you to back him in any World Series event, with you getting to keep 92 percent of his winnings."

Yeah, sure. Even if the railbird didn't oversell himself by 1,000 percent, and even if he did put the money into a tournament instead of beer and cigarettes, and even if by some miracle he did cash out, your only problem would be tracking him down and collecting your share.

Nah. Better stick with Frank. And if you do decide to back him, please tell him it's because you read this column. He's giving me a 15 percent kickback. More importantly, he persuaded me to write this flattering endorsement by promising to have the Poker Federation name my favorite hand in Omaha eight-or-better after me. Henceforth, A-A-2-3 double-suited will be known as "Maxwell."

Thank you, Frank.