Poker 101

I had planned to commit a few articles to behavior and ethics in poker. I am now finding that the thoughts I have are more far-reaching than I had expected. It is not that I didn't think so many players are affected, but that so many players and readers would take the time to write to me about some of their experiences while playing. Folks, many of them are not good, and it just has to stop! Before we chase off the nice majority in favor of the bad minority, let's get vocal and tell our cardroom managers that we are "mad as hell and we aren't going to take it anymore," to quote the great movie Network. Here are a reader's comments regarding some of the past few articles about behavior and how it affects his desire to continue patronizing his local cardroom. In this reader's case, there is only one cardroom within hundreds of miles, so he really has no options other than to stop playing public poker. Is this what we want to have happen?

Hi Jan:

I enjoyed your recent Card Player article on player behavior. I liked your comments on how players should do what they can to keep a game running smoothly and fairly, and I always try to do this. I have never agreed with the policy: "If you are not in the hand, keep your mouth shut."

A while ago, I began studying "troublesome" players to try to get some idea as to why they act the way they do. I wanted to run some observations by you.

In your article, you wrote: "When you go out to play, one of the reasons that you do so is to have a good time, right? If it isn't, it should be. How can you have a good time if you or the players around you are not having a good time?"

I think the majority of players agree with you (I certainly do!), but there is a certain type of person out there who just doesn't – and this type seems drawn to poker rooms.

He (or she) does not want you to have a good time. He does not care if you are having fun, and in fact, he considers it a "victory" if he can stop you from having fun. Wrecking a fun, peaceful situation seems to be more important than winning money to this person. He does this in any way possible: angle-shooting, misbehaving, throwing cards, berating opponents, swearing, and so on.

We have seen these people all our lives. They are the ones who have been ruining perfectly happy situations from preschool through college, careers, and nursing homes. They are the ones you see on the road cutting off other drivers for no other reason than they can.

There is one guy in the cardroom where I play who enters $2-$4 games (he normally plays $8-$16 and $15-$30) for the sole purpose of annoying people and basically wrecking other players' fun. If there is a loud argument at a table, I don't even have to look, because I know that he is the center of it.

One of his favorite tactics is to wear headphones, not turn them on, and then pretend that he doesn't know the action is on him and ask, "What? Me? Who raised? How much?" over and over again when it is his turn to act. If a player asks him to "pay attention," he asks, "What?" to anything anyone says. There is no rational reason for this behavior. Recently, I saw him being escorted to the door by a floorperson after a nasty, loud argument. It should never been allowed to go that far.

Many times, these people are simply unhappy with themselves and are consciously or subconsciously projecting their misery onto others. I have seen this a lot when I am playing with someone who's going through a divorce or other troubling personal time. Other times, they are just "attention freaks." They continually are the center of the arguments, floor calls, and shouting matches.

I used to get angry and annoyed at these people, but now I kind of feel sorry for them.

So, my question became, "What should I do about it?" Well, one thing that definitely does not work is dealing with them rationally. They couldn't care less what you think about their behavior, and the more annoyed you are, the better. I have found that the only way to deal with the situation is to go against my instinct of addressing the situation myself. I immediately call the floorperson over and explain the situation. I have noticed that if floorpeople are continually forced to address an individual's bad behavior, eventually they will ask that person to leave. I think this is important, as I have witnessed the bad behavior of a couple of individuals wreck a cardroom experience for new players, and the new players don't return because they aren't having fun. This is very, very bad for poker and should not be allowed to happen.

This works only if the players, dealers, and floorpeople stay on top of not letting these people get away with bad behavior. Staying silent or, heaven forbid, arguing with these sad people does nothing to solve the problem.

Thanks for a great column,

Dan Contreras

In answer to your question of what you should do about it, talk to the shift supervisor and the cardroom manager, if necessary. Oftentimes, they are unaware of what is going on, as many dealers will "take" the abuse for whatever reason. Talk to them privately and give accurate and detailed information about what has transpired. If they know about it, they can act. If they know about it and choose to look the other way, it is time to move on to a cardroom where management is receptive to the idea of doing what is right and what is good for the majority of players. The customers who are offended by these nasty players are the player base that management should be interested in. In any cardroom worth its salt, that is the way it is. Talk to them, please. Class dismissed.