Buddha's Third Act - What a guy!

An old adage warns that there are no third acts in American life. Don't tell that to my friend Buddha.



First Act: He appears onstage as the biggest player in California.

Second Act: He's dragged offstage and sent to jail for 21 years.

Third Act: He's ready to come back onstage with a book and a movie about him.

How can anyone keep up with this guy?



I once wrote two columns about this rollicking young man who had become a legend in California, as much as for his outrageous verbal abuse of dealers as for his sky-high play. He gambled in Larry Flynt's stud game and, playing pai gow against third-party bankers, routinely won or lost hundreds of thousands of dollars in a single session. He called himself the "King of Pai Gow," and it was no exaggeration. Buddha (aka Robert Gomez) got his nickname from his bulky build and shaved head. He told me his unlimited bankroll came from a $20 million inheritance from his South American grandfather, and his mother had another 70 mil or so.



Not exactly. Buddha was later arrested inside the Hustler Casino with more than $800,000 in chips in his possession. He and two others were charged with bilking church people out of many millions by promising them nonexistent automobiles for pennies on the dollar. Buddha was supposed to be the adopted son and heir of a wealthy and religious New York businessman who died and wanted churchgoers rewarded for their piety. The indictment charged that the trio claimed to have had 7,000 autos available, and that most of the money they collected was deposited into players' accounts at various L.A.-area casinos to be money-laundered by Buddha. The trial was held in Kansas City, and Buddha was eventually convicted on all 23 counts, fined $12.5 million, and sentenced to 21 years in a federal prison facility in Texas.



Since then he's written to me frequently, insisting he's about to win his appeal for a new trial and telling me about his "huge" upcoming book and movie deals. Sure enough, a book about the "Miracle Cars" scam called God Wants You to Roll, written by John Phillips III, is now in bookstores, and it's a real page-turner, a riveting step-by-step account of how the con came about. Buddha's on the cover, grinning ferociously and clutching a big wad of bills. But the book didn't come out entirely to his liking. "That – – – – – – – book was filled with lies and so many more lies," he indignantly wrote to me in his most recent letter. He even said he wasn't happy with some of the things that I was quoted as saying about him. Yeah, terrible things, like he was a compelling figure, but it was hard to separate fact from fiction in what he said.



I had wanted to do a third column to update my fans, but I was afraid to take the chance. You see, there once had been some scary posts about Buddha on

rec.gambling.poker. He was accused of money-laundering for a dangerous drug cartel, having mob connections, and blowing up the car of a guy who had crossed him. Now, I'm not afraid of having my old car blown up, because I could collect on the insurance. What had worried me was the chance that Buddha might mistakenly blow up my sweetie's car, the P.T. Cruiser she got for once winning a best all-around player at a tournament, and then my life would really be in danger.



My fears were alleviated after I read God Wants You to Roll. In it, Phillips reveals that the drug cartel/mob/car-bombing warnings were posted by Buddha himself.



OK, so why do I continue maintaining communications with this undeniably intelligent and fascinating, but also unpredictable, not entirely believable, and possibly even dangerous prison inmate? No, you cynics, it's not just to get column material. It's all about loyalty, friendship … and the fact that there's $8.7 million of the Miracle Cars money that's still unaccounted for. Buddha, in the book and in his letters, said he has money stashed away in foreign banks that the government can't get to. In the book, he also hinted that he may have buried his treasure in the backyard of one of the houses he had occupied. Interestingly, Robert Turner now lives in one of those houses. So, if you happen to drive by Turner's residence at 4 a.m. and see the old Chip Burner frantically digging holes in his backyard, you'll know he's not planting zucchini.



OK, so what about the film? Well, the Hollywood Reporter recently disclosed that New Line Cinema will be producing a Miracle Cars movie "based on the true story of Robert Gomez and James Nichols, two 19-year-olds who committed the largest auto fraud in U.S. history. While working as security guards in Carson, California, the duo sold $21 million worth of nonexistent cars," the story said.



Will this finally make Buddha happy? Perhaps not. First of all, the upcoming movie is described as a comedy, which I don't think Buddha will appreciate. Much worse, his partner, Nichols, apparently will get top billing while Buddha will be portrayed as the instigator. Here's how a New Line exec describes it:



"The two characters are so compelling. The Gomez character is really charismatic and clever, but the heart of Miracle Cars is Nichols, this kid who really tried to do good but became an unwitting accomplice."

A young African-American actor by the name of Nick Cannon has already been cast to portray Nichols. Buddha's role is up for grabs. Dirty Wally made a bid, but for some strange reason, was turned down – probably because he can't play pai gow.



What's next? How about a reality TV show featuring Buddha and Martha Stewart called Famous Felons? She could give lessons on how to decorate a cell and he could tell you how to blow up a car. The partnership might not pan out, though. She might try to sell him stock in a company about to declare bankruptcy, and he might to try to pay for the shares with cars that had been in probate for 25 years.



When might Buddha be back in action? Well, even if he can get his sentence shortened, don't look for him at the tables in California casinos anytime soon. Whether they would let him back in again is problematical. More critical is that $12.5 million fine hanging over his head. I talked with a Justice Department agent who helped build a case against Buddha and then arrested him, and who now works for Southern California casinos in an advisory capacity. He laughed that the second Buddha pulled out a bankroll, it would be grabbed away from him before it hit the table.



Well, let's see what happens. And while we're waiting for Martha, keep checking your TV listings. Dateline NBC filmed Buddha in prison for one of its shows, although no airdate had been set as of this writing. Meanwhile, if anyone has any idea where that $8.7 million might be, please e-mail me.